“During this new year I resolve to begin a new life. I do not know what will happen to me during this year. But I abandon myself entirely to you, my God. And my aspirations and all my affections will be for You. I feel so weak, dear Jesus, but with Your help I hope and resolve to live a different life, that is, a life closer to You.” – St Gemma Galgani
2019 has arrived and with it hope for a beautiful, grace-filled new year. Today I consecrated myself to Jesus through Mary after preparing with the 33 Days to Morning Glory book.
The holidays always leave me feeling a bit lonely as regular church events and weekly groups don’t meet and friends leave town. God met my loneliness at Mass this evening. Shortly after arriving and saying my prayers a few of my friends also arrived and sat with me. It was completely unexpected as I was at a church that is in a small town outside of the city I live in and it was the 5:30 mass for the Solemnity of Mary, Mother of God. God’s graces are abundant.
After the Mass I stayed to pray my consecration prayer. I kneeled in the pew and whispered it slowly. A coolness enveloped me and a peace arrived. My friends, noticing I had stopped to pray, waited for me and upon hearing I had just done the consecration they congratulated me and rejoiced.
We talked a bit and caught up on holiday stories before we started to go our separate ways. Not ready to leave, I headed to the Adoration chapel and prayed a Rosary in Thanksgiving.
Yesterday, a bit of sadness lay over me, but now, I look forward to the year with hope and joy. I struggle a lot with selfishness that leads me to retreat, but I noticed that I always feel worse when I am focused on what I want. When I am service oriented, when my work is for God and others, rather than my own pleasure and goals, that is when happiness abounds. So my new year’s resolution is to set aside selfishness, to offer myself as a servant to those around me. I fear this will be difficult but I trust in God’s grace which he pours out to those who ask. And, with St. Teresa of Lisieux I proclaim “I want them all.”